Why I’ll never run out of plot ideas

paintI woke up yesterday morning to youngest daughter’s announcement, “Mom, come quick! There are huge puddles of red and blue stuff in the laundry room!” I staggered out of bed, and went downstairs to find that a gallon of red paint had fallen from the shelf and now covered the floor. Along side it, was a puddle of blue laundry soap. The soap container, oddly enough, sat several feet away on the dryer. It’s still a mystery to me how a large soap puddle accumulated next to the paint on the floor. Aliens? Ghosts? The evil house cats at work?

None of the aforementioned groups was considerate enough to clean up the mess. That was left to me. Youngest daughter trotted off to school while I unrolled paper towels over the mess. I soon got red paint on the bottom of my pajamas. Not wanting to ruin them, I took them off and put them in a bucket of water. This by the way, left red footprints across the kitchen. Moments later, I realized none of my clothes were safe as long as I was dripping paint covered paper towels into a trash bag, so I took my other clothes off too.

Have you ever noticed how slippery liquid laundry detergent is? I couldn’t help but notice this fact as I stepped on it and slid around like a beginning ice skater.

The problem with being a writer is that I have a vivid imagination, and I could easily imagine what would happen next. I was going to fall, break something important, and have to call 911. Several paramedics–undoubtedly some that I knew–would come to my house and carry my naked, paint covered body to the ER. I’d look like an aging porn star that was trying her hand at horror movies. Someone with a cell phone would capture the event and post it on Youtube.

It wasn’t a happy thought. But it was one that I could use in a book someday. One of my heroines will have to have a painting accident. I’m foreseeing a hot paramedic in her future.

Luckily, I didn’t fall and break anything, and the shower washed away my ax murderer appearance. The door needs to be repainted, but the floor is mostly back to normal.

Hopefully the ghosts will now find something else to do besides mess up my laundry room.


Why I’ll never run out of plot ideas — 13 Comments

  1. HAHAHAHAHAH! I tried to keep in my laughter since I’m at work, but that didn’t happen. I just laughed and laughed and laughed! And then I had to show my coworkers. And they laughed and laughed and laughed too.

    Interesting story plot! Although, I totally thought you were going to say that you thought of a Ghost story that you could write. Ghosts can be hot too! Especially if they’re, like, Mr. Darcy’s lingering spirit or something!

    Best of luck with your writing. Although, you don’t even need it!

  2. This happened to me once…sort of. Here I am, staring at the ceiling around midnight, and I hear weird noises coming from the floor below me. RumblerumblerumbleCHUGrumblerumble. The next morning, I go downstairs and discover the washing machine has moved two feet on its own. Did it vibrate that far? Or did travelers from the Dimension of Lost Socks push it aside on their way through a portal?

  3. So that’s how your characters always end up in embarrassing situations! I can’t wait to read about the hot paramedic 🙂

  4. Hahahahaha! This happened to you ONLY to give you more incredible ideas! Now I know why you’re such a good writer! HEY! In the book I pitched at 2014 conference, my heroine is rescued by a hot paramedic! No she wasn’t naked nor covered in paint–too bad I didn’t see your blog before I wrote the scene!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahahaha. (She is covered with a rusty old car hood, though. That’s good enough.)

  5. At least your daughter didn’t hang around long enough to grab some photos. Janette, you were made for comedy.

  6. Hahaha! I’m sorry this happened to you, but it is still so funny. Hopefully it’s not your computer gremlins trying to move on to bigger appliances . . .

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